Maria and Shawn, the lovely couple in our last two stories, lived in a not-so-good neighborhood. Maria’s nightmare of getting framed for drug possession was almost premonition-like as it turned out that it did happen–to another couple.

Back at their new home in a much better neighborhood, Maria and Shawn went about their normal routine. They hadn’t finished furnishing their new place, and was going to look for some rugs for their living room. While Maria was cooking, Shawn was looking through the paper and saw a store selling discount rugs. Maria almost dropped the eggs on the floor.

“Are you nuts?!”

“Come on honey! They have great prices! You know we already spent a fortune on furniture. Do you really want to spend a fortune on something that gets dirty faster?”

“But you saw the news! You can’t trust everything that says ‘discount’, you know!”

Frustrated, Shawn left the house with a slam of the door. He drove down to the discount rug store and looked around. The rugs looked beautiful; the kinds that Maria would love. But alas, she didn’t want to even give this place a chance. He went to find a store worker, and spoke to her.

“How may I help you?”

“I need a nice green and cream rug. Do you have any?”

“Of course! I have the perfect one for you!”

The worker showed Shawn a rug. It was really big, and just the right mix of colors for his liking. “I’ll take it!”, he exclaimed.

“Okay, I will have this out to your home in a few days. Enjoy sir!”

A few days later, the beautiful rug was delivered to their home. Maria opened the door.

“What is this?”

Shawn came downstairs to the living room. “Oh, that’s our rug from the discount store! Let me lay it out now before I forget! I told you there was nothing to worry about!”

Before Maria can open her mouth to yell at him, Shawn unrolled the rug and discovered something that frightened the both of them.

A dead rat.

I love how a heartfelt post turns into something that has amused the hell out of me. Keep the laughs coming guys! Love you both!

Anyway, I just realized that NaNo coming up soon. Okay, two months, but still. It’s already September; soon we’ll be singing holiday songs and some of us will be cursing the snow. Then after the holidays are done, some will be looking into the hottest weight loss product in January. Oh, how fast the time flies.

But yeah, I was considering participating in NaNo this year as well. But I feared that it would end up like my first idea, which I haven’t touched in so long. Something that I should do, because I liked the idea, I just went through that second-week curse, and I never recovered. I don’t know yet, but I have two months to come up with a good storyline. Or at least one that won’t make me lose focus after the second week.

I need to have patience.

Murray Feiss was always the black sheep in the family. He was always told to be like his 5 siblings, but he would purposely do the opposite, to his parents’ dismay. His parents put all of the children through school, and while 5 of them went into what would be considered “realistic career paths”, Murray decided that he was going to go into game designing.

He never heard the end of the verbal onslaught everyone dished out to him. It didn’t stop him though.

During one holiday, he and the rest of the family got together. Everyone was griping about how much they hate their job, saying that it was too dirty, too painful, too loud, and so on. Murray thought it would be a good idea to speak up from out of the crowd.

“I love my job.”

Everyone stared blankly at him, as if to say “how dare he interrupt?!”. Then one of his brothers said, “your job is why you’ve never had a girlfriend.”

Murray became silent. He can’t argue the truth. He did love his job, but everyone around him got married and had kids, and he’s never even had his first kiss. To have his brother make him realize that reduced him to tears, but lit another fire under him.

He has his job, now it’s time for him to find someone to make him truly happy.

(Not finished, I know, but I’m tired, lol)

A woman was looking up online for the best life insurance rates that she can find for her husband and her. They were a young couple, but they didn’t want to take any chances.

Or rather, she was so scared because her husband was so accident prone, the odds of him killing himself without even trying is astronomically high. Her husband, on the other hand, thinks that she’s just paranoid.

Him: Oh, come on, hon! Do you really need to look into life insurance this early? We’re not even 50 yet! We’re not even thirty yet!

Her: Not taking any risks. You know how you are.

Him: Oooh, I trip every once in a while.

Her: Trip right into live wires.

Him: Okay, I might watch television while I’m splashing in the tub.

Her: …Just proved my point.

Him: Am I really that accident prone?

Her: Yes.

Him: How about you?

Her: Oh, I’m just peachy. I always watch where I’m walking so I don’t step on the cat’s tail–

Him: I was drunk; that doesn’t count!

Her: I clean up my spills so that I don’t slip into the fridge–

Him: Oh, come on! You know that I was gonna clean that up!

Her: And I always make sure that electronics work properly before I operate them so that I don’t electrocute myself while figuring out what’s wrong.

Him: Um…remember that time with the toaster?

Her: That doesn’t count!

Him: That was funny as hell–your hair looked just like the bread…crispy!

Her: Shaddup!

Him: Not so perfect, are ya?!

Frustrated, she got up from her desk and went to step down. The moment she did, she heard the cat yowl. She stepped on her tail. Startled by the yowl, she falls back onto her desk, effectively breaking it in half, along with the computer.

All the while, her husband is laughing hard, then stops.

Him: Are you all right?

Her: Oh, shut up!