Birthday Contest Winner!

The voting is closed, and the votes have been tallied. After 1.4 million votes, the winner of this contest is coming up…after the break. Okay, kidding.

One of my earliest memories is of when I learned to read. At the age
of 4 I was getting the hang of putting a sentence together and
actually understanding what it meant. My mother had a very, *very* bad
habit of reading while she was in the toilet (usually doing what you
might know as “#2?) and this used to piss my father off, especially
when both toilets were in use and he needed to relieve himself. Now,
being very interested in my new found literacy, I would read every
book I could get my hands on, and thanks to my mother – who was and
still is a veracious reader – I had lots of children’s books at my
disposal. One morning while in the toilet (on a school morning too!) I
decided to read on of the books my mother bought me on the previous
Saturday. I was deeply into my book when my father banged on the door
and screamed at me that we were running to late and that I should get
a move on. I said okay, but went back to my book. Minutes later he
opens the door to see me in half of my school uniform, deeply
engrossed in my book. My father was mad and had a small hissy fit, but
my mother was hovering in the background, beaming at her only child
reading a book while taking a dump.

This childhood memory was submitted by Louise. Congrats, and I shall be getting back to you. Thanks to all who voted, and thanks for the three ladies who submitted their entries.